Whoopee!!

Yessss! I am once again alone in the laboratory... Times like these make me ponder more on what's been happening in my life. I get to think more about my plans and goals as well as bum about the bad times I've had for the past few days.

At 23, I used to think I have achieved much already in life than most 23-year-old girls do. But if you really think about it, nothing has changed in my life; I am still stuck in school, still can't earn my own money, and still can't move on in life. Simply put, I am still nobody so I have no reason to think I am great after all. While my other friends have moved on into the world of professional work, here I am living in the world of school work with no job experience whatsoever.

Honestly, I can't wait to graduate from my post grad degree. This has been exhausting my energy for the past year; I literally have no time to meet up with most of my friends because I spend my weekends in the lab. It's like my world revolves around the four walls of the Sensors Lab alone. Argh!

Anyway, enough of my whining... let me get back to my lab work now before I get any more Bea Alonzo-ish dramatic. It's almost 8 PM and I need to catch the last shuttle trip.

Just missing my blog

I can't even log on in to my email account. Can't post pics for Wordless Wednesday. Can't do tags. Can't do opps (actually, there are no opps to do!) Haaaay.

I am doing this post because I terribly miss blogging, and I won't allow my busy-ness and laziness to take over me once again.

I need to update this blog over the weekend, I just hope I find the time to do so. Free, chill time is so scarce these days.

Is it just me or is it the world?

Today, I realized that no matter how careful you are on the road, you will always encounter a rude driver who's ready to take you down no matter what.

Thank you, Lord for keeping us all safe.

Try my shoes

28 December 2007 (Friday)

1. Submit PCASTRD letter (8 AM)
2. Go to school for experiment (8 AM to 5 PM)
3. Parish Youth Ministry's Christmas party for the less fortunate kids (1 PM - 5 PM)
4. Hannah's request: Visit Lia in the afternoon (probably around 2 PM and onwards)
5. Shopping again with Tita Alice (?) (after lunch)
6. Comedy bar with Tito Boy and his family (evening)


29 December 2007 (Saturday)

1. Go to school for experiment (8 AM to 5 PM)
2. Tagaytay with Tito Boy and the whole family (lunch till afternoon)
3. Lectors and Commentators Christmas party (7 PM)
4. Better Living DWTL Christmas Party (8 PM)
5. Poker/Gambling night (9 PM and onwards)


30 December 2007 (Sunday)

1. Manalangsang family reunion (whole day)
2. Aussie WYD screening (4 PM)
3. Poker/Gambling night (9 PM and onwards)


Should I start breaking myself into pieces now? How in the world will I do/attend all these?!

Kill me, please! NOW NA!

3rd devil down

Yes, another devil has fallen.

After Hannah was side-swiped by an 18-wheeler along SLEX...

After Lia got herself into some serious foot ligament injury caused by PUV carelessness along Alabang Zapote Road...

It's my turn!

After 5 years since I learned how to drive, I got myself into a very minor car accident for the first time yesterday. As Mom was about to get off to buy some meds in the drugstore, a CRV accidentally hit our car while it was backing off. The driver probably didn't notice us parked behind, and his mind was probably somewhere else because I kept honking to make him stop and wait for me to move my car first, yet he still went on.

The CRV's driver admitted his mistake and told us he was looking only at the right side mirror so he really didn't notice us. I thought the damage was huge because it made a pretty big cracking sound. Buti nalang it produced only a small dent on the right side of the car just above the rear wheel. I let Mom talk things out with him because I was really annoyed and pissed... I might let out the bitch in me eh. Good thing din na small lang yung dent and the guy agreed to pay for the damage he caused.

I tell you, the feeling was terrible as you see your car being hit. Traumatic talaga. In fact, on the way home, I was paranoid that all cars coming near me will hit me!

So... I am the third of the evil girls to fall. Two more are left. Be careful, both of you! They're out to get us! Haha!

The gods have spoken

And they said no, the universe is not conspiring for your success, you assuming biatch!

My presentation makes me feel crap. I feel like I'm not going to finish this post grad course in a million years! And it's not helping that I am pioneering this study! That's supposed to be a good thing in the first place!

I know that instead of whining, I should go and prove to myself that I CAN! I know I CAN naman eh, it's just that I am so depressed with the situation now. I am at the stage of my life that I truly feel that my back is against the wall. It's just for now, so please let me feel this way: I am doomed to fail.

Tomorrow is a new day I can't wait to face.

I live another day

Okay. Remember what's killing me lately?

I was assigned to present my research updates tomorrow, but for some crazy reason held by the One that makes the universe turn, I have been saved from Doomsville. The presentation has been moved to Thursday, 6 December. Yeahhh!

Actually, there are two major reasons why my presentation is not pushing through tomorrow. One, my adviser will not be around and there's no way I'm going to present without him. Two, the research center staff members need to leave early for a commitment, so nobody will facilitate the reporting.

If you ask me, I'd like to think of it this way: the research gods see my agony and have decided to spare me this time. Thank you, thank you. I'm sure you know how I badly need more time to prepare myself for this.

Funny how things are starting to go my way now -- they usually don't! Maybe the universe is finally conspiring for my success. *insert millions of crossed fingers here*

We'll see. =)

I miss you.

In your lifetime, there will always be people whom you will remember for the many good (or bad!) things they did to you. That someone whom you had your first date with. That someone who first broke your heart. That someone whom you had very very good conversations with (which by the way lasted for hours!). That someone who first called you names. That someone who made you cry all night long.

Then there's this one who you can't seem to forget no matter how many years passed. Who made you happy with even the corniest of jokes. Who stunned you with his witty comments on life. Who was amazing by being simply himself...

We may never get the chance to talk like we used to, we may never be the same again. But just in case I wasn't able to tell you, thinking about our memories still make me smile. Thank you. You are forever in my heart. =)

I miss you, CJ. And you don't know how incredibly much.

(It's funny how Avril's "I miss you..." kept on playing in my head as i was doing this post!)

Student eternally

If you guys are wondering if I have finished my post-grad studies, well, the answer is NO.

I know, I know. I was supposed to finish everything last year, but things didn't go my way and for once I was convinced that the universe conspires for my failure. It's really hard not to know which direction to take, especially when people are constantly breathing down your neck. You tend to try and live up to the expectations that people have set for you, only to realize that these "wonderful things" do not necessarily make you happy.

I sat in my room for several hours. I thought of the situtation I have myself in. No, I do not believe in mistakes, in wrong decisions. There are no mistakes in this life, just lessons. And it's up to you to pick up those lessons and learn from them. It is by learning that you appreciate the value of what you have or what you have been through.

No, I have no regrets. And if I were given the chance to go back to March of 2005, I'd still pick this route among all the other routes that were laid before me. In the two years that I've been in this predicament, I honestly have learned and gained lessons that changed the way I see things and people now. The experience may have been bitter at times, but hey! I'm still doing good. :)

After all, happiness is relative. Being happy doesn't mean everything's perfect. It means you have decided to see life beyond the imperfections. Don't be happy because everything is alright. Be happy because everything sucks but you're still doing fine.

Wow. Thank God for this opportunity to grow.

Drama ito! I am in the lab right now, in senti mode because nobody's here, making important scientific work happen. Later on this day I shall attend another DWTL batch at the Pollock Renewal Center in Ateneo. Grabe, there's just so much to be thankful for!

I must now go back to nerd mode. Duty calls!